A couple of years ago I performed at SWEA’s Lucia Celebration in Dallas. The choir had spent time rehearsing and I was also going to sing a solo… or so I thought. When I came to the concert that morning I was informed that another person was going to sing my solo. Okay. Not much I could do about it. I then saw that her name was printed in the program which told me that this had not come up over night, this was planned but not told to me. I was so hurt. I performed with the choir and left the event right afterwards. Said to myself that unless either an up straight apology came to me I would not participate in any event put on by this organization. I wasn’t disappointed or mad at anyone specific, or the organization really, I was hurt by how disrespectfully I was treated.

So I was quite surprise earlier this year when I found out that Ikea actually got my name from SWEA, the organizer of the Lucia Celebration. I was very grateful and honoroed that they had mentioned me, as I am not even a member.

Earlier this year I received a couple of emails that was sent out to several people, asking if I was interested in joining the Swedish Choir for this year’s Lucia Celebration. I threw them right in the trash. Not going through that pain and disappointment again. A little surprised by my own reaction. Just thinking about this hurt. Usually i can move on and shake it off me but yet after all this years the pain still lingered in the back of my head.

This morning I had a Facebook message from the woman who sent out the emails earlier this year. This was not a group message. It was a sincere personal request if I would consider joining the choir this year. The choir has been reformed and she understood that I probably couldn’t join in many rehearsals but this after all, are songs we all have sung our entire lives.
At first I was reluctant with accepting the invite. Many negative thoughts went through my head. Were they THAT desperate for people that they now contacted me? But then I read the message a couple of more times. There was something that told me that if they are trying to reach out to me, invite me to join the choir with a personal message; then it is time for me to put on the big girl pants, be an adult and reach out and meet that hand. This is my opportunity to move on. This is kind of an apology. And I love Lucia, I love to perform. So I said yes.

I had planned to go to the event and just sit in the audience but that was just because I wanted to buy cinnamon buns and saffron buns. I knew it would be so odd to sit in the audience. I would sit there and wanting to be singing instead. Now I will sing. Now is the time to dust off the Swedish Christmas songs and make it all happen for real! And I am super excited about it!

So if you are in Dallas on December 3, come and listen! It would mean the world to me if you came, even though most of the songs are in Swedish you may recognize them. Interesting to hear it in another language! I will do one, maybe two solo’s…