I saw this on Facebook a while back and I just had to share it and put some of my own experiences and comments around it, as the alien I am…

THINGS I LEARNED LIVIN’ IN TEXAS ….

1) A possum is a flat animal that sleeps in the middle of the road.
Well it is a cute animal and thankfully I have been able to avoid them so far. But they are very cute alive!

2) There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 of them live in Texas.
Yepp… and I don’t like them!

3) There are 10,000 types of spiders, and all 10,000 of them live in Texas.
Also true… and I don’t like them either but they are easier to kill than snakes!

4) If it grows, it’ll stick ya. If it crawls, it’ll bite cha.
I can agree with this too!

5) “Onced” and “Twiced” are words.
Yes and it took me a while to understand when I got here!

6) It is not a shopping cart, it’s a buggy.
Also a word that took me a while to get used to say… now it’s a buggy, even for someone like me!

7) “Jawl-P?” means, “Did y’all go to the bathroom?”
Yes, if you say this as it’s written that is exactly what it means…

8) People actually grow and eat okra.
And it is nasty!

9) “Fixinto” is one word.
Texas is the only place I’ve heard this expression but it is very handy!

10) There is no such thing as lunch. There is only dinner and then there is supper…
I actually disagree with this because I eat lunch and dinner but I know many people does say dinner and supper…

11) Iced tea is appropriate for all meals, and you start drinking it when you’re two. We do like a little tea with our sugar..
And if you drink hot tea they look at you very strangely! It seems like the sweeter tea the better… and you drink it 24/7/365 and to everything!

12) Backwards and forwards means, “I know everythin’ ’bout you.
Well yes and then you have the expression going back and fourth which I disagree with, you have to go forward to be able to go backwards… it is all very confusing!

13) The word “jeet” is actually a phrase meaning, “Did you eat?”
Haha, yeah! I’ve never thought about it this way but saying it out loud it’s true!

14) You don’t have to wear a watch, because it doesn’t matter what time it is.. You work until you’re done or it’s too dark to see…
Unless you work EMS…

15) You don’t PUSH buttons, you MASH ’em.
HAHAHAHAHA! True!

16) You measure distance in hours.
Oh yes! and “Down The Road” can be anything between 1 and 6 hours driving time.

17) You switch from heat to A/C in the same day.
Yes. I always have to have two sets of clothes with me every day, one for the mornings and one for the afternoon!

18) All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, insect, or animal.
Never thought about it but yeah, it is!

19) You know what a “Dawg” is.
That is exactly how they say dog here…

20) You carry jumper cables in your car – for your own car.
Yepp, they drive trucks and that is standard to have, especially if you have an older model!

21) You only own five spices: salt, pepper, Tony Chachere’s, Tabasco, and Tex Joy Steak Seasoning.
And Jalapeño…. they love their hot spices!

22) The local papers cover national and international news on one page, but require 6 pages for local gossip and local football…
Yes! There is nothing bigger than high school football! That was certainly a new thing for me when I got here, and to be honest, I still don’t see the fun with it but I don’t have kids either…

23) You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.
The amount of people taking off this day is insane! It’s like Texas close!

24) You find 100 degrees “a bit warm.”
It’s comfortable! But 102 degrees is hot!

25) You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, still summer, and Christmas.
Well, there is Fall and that is everyone’s favorite season for sure!

26) Going to Walmart is a favorite past time known as “Goin’ Walmartin” or “off to Wally World.”
Haha, true!

27) You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chili weather..
And the Texans celebrates it!

28) Fried catfish is the other white meat.
But they love their catfish!!!

29) We don’t need no dang Driver’s Ed. . . if our mama says we can drive, we can drive.
Yepp, and if it drizzles or rain it goes faster than normal so you get to your destination as fast as possible! And God forbid snow… that is a different level of driving in Texas!

30) You understand these jokes and forward them to your Texas friends and those who just wish they were from Texas.
Yeah, Texas is absolutely a crazy but wonderful place and I have yet a lot to figure out after 12 years here!